"I bought myself a parrot that could talk, but it did not say 'I'm hungry', so it died."--Mitch Hedberg
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Friday, October 21, 2005

Good Sex, Bad Lex? Part II

Anyway, back to Smallville.

So episode 2 of season 5 was another great, for a lot of reasons. First of all, Clark and Lana are together. Finally. At last. Jesus, it's taken four seasons to get here? They were supposed to be like this from day one, but whatever. I digress. ;-) So it was nice to see them together acting like an actual couple. Very cool.

I really loved the continuity in this episode. Mentions of Jason and Clark's old girlfriend, a BRILLIANT exchange between Clark and Chloe about how Pete knew about Clark's powers, and best of all...the reintroduction of the Level Three plotline (which the writers had claimed they would carelessly forget). Another great episode.

And the sex scene...I had a LOT of doubts about it in the beginning, but really, when all is said and done, it was very well handled. They set it up as Clark and Lana being two people who were really ready to start a loving relationship and take the next step in that relationship. Hey, this IS a modern retelling of Superman!!

Onto episode 3. At first, glance, this is just a filler episode. Even so, it's a damn good one. You finally see some fallout of the recent meteor shower, as this crazy kid hijacks a nuclear facility and is gonna blow up Smallville. Simple enough, eh?

Only Clark doesn't have his powers...and top of that...he was just SHOT. Yeah, with a bullet. And on top of THAT, he dies. SUPERMAN. FLIPPING. DIES. Thinking back now I remember how sick this episode was, and how unbelievably pumped I was when just as Clark passes away, Lionel wakes up from his daze, punches through the glass, and SPEEDS AWAY.


You just don't get any better than John Glover with superpowers going all kick@$$. You just don't.

So Lionel's at the Fortress now, and Jor-El has taken over his body. Apparently, when Lionel came in contact with one of the stones last season, his body was transformed into a "VESSEL OF KRYPTONIAN KNOWLEDGE." Sound familiar? Not to anyone reading this, I'll bet. Sounds a bit like the Eradicator to me. But anyways, Jor-El has assumed Lionel's body. So Jor-El can take over Lionel now and come face to face with Clark. He brings Clark back to life, despite Clark's protests....with one big, frikkin huge consequence: SOMEONE CLOSE TO CLARK WILL DIE.

That's awesome. Sorry, but it is. And it gets better. Clark gets his powers back and it's like he never lost them. The guy JUMPS onto one of the nuclear missles, dismantles it as it heads into the atmosphere, and saves the day. That's Superman, folks. Brilliant.


Episode 4 featured none other than the King of the Seven Seas himself, Aquaman. Or a young version of him, anyway.

First of all, this episode would get a 10 in my book just for the simple fact that Lois walks around in a bikini for half of it. HELL yes.


So Aquaman in his younger days is a guy who has a penchant for wearing an orange shirt and green pants (clever nod to the comics), talks like a surfer, and is all for saving the animals. He starts hitting on Lois after he saves her from drowning, but Clark suspects something's amiss with this guy. So he tracks him down in the water. Aquaman can swim like Clark runs out of water. It's a cool effect. Best of all though, is the underwater fight between Clark and Arthur (that's Aquaman's name). Needless to say, Clark gets his ass handed to him. He's not in his element under the water.

Arthur's trying to disable these weapons Lex has been developing that will blow up submarines or something but at the risk of killing all of the fish around it. Arthur's not down with that. So he and Clark team up and stop Lex. I love seeing Lex step into his villain role. Rosenbaum has really gotten to spread his wings over the course of this show as a kind Lex, a crazy Lex, and now an evil Lex.

But the best parts of this episode come from (a.) James Marsters (commonly known as Spike from the brilliant Buffy and Angel) as Clark's new history professor (who unbeknownst to Clark is also the evil Brainiac), and (b.) the clever inside jokes with Aquaman. At one point, Aquaman suggests that he and Clark form the Junior Lifeguards Association, to which Clark replies, "I don't think I'm ready for the JLA just yet." Also, in a clever nod to the HBO show Entourage in which a running gag and main plot thread has been the development of an Aquaman movie, Arthur tells Lex that "he doesn't travel in an entourage."

So far, season 5 has been fantastic. I'm absolutely loving it. The next episode looks god-awful, but I can excuse one bad one as long as they keep up with the goodies. I want more James Marsters, more Lionel, more mythology, and more scantily-clad Lois. If I get all this, I will be one happy fan.

I'm out.


Blogger The Ravenous Pedestrian said...

lana is hot.

8:16 AM

Blogger Kobe said...

The most alarming of this episode was too see Clark and Lane together, we have to wait so much to look at. However He probably needed use viagra online in their fist time, because she was a lot for him.

8:30 AM

Blogger mewmewmew said...

I know you wrote this about 5 years ago, but I found this today! :) I am finishing the book right now and agree with you completely. Great book. They are making a movie of it due to come out in 2012...hopefully they don't mess it up!

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